Being a teenager is difficult enough without the stress of a pandemic. Even under normal circumstances, teenagers worry about school, friendships, families, their future, among many concerns. However, the coronavirus pandemic has made life even harder for teenagers. With school closures and cancelled events, many teenagers are not able to participate in many big moments of adolescence, e.g. parties, graduations, sports events, as well as daily events such as interacting with friends and being in class at school. Recent surveys have noted increased rates of anxiety and depression among teenagers. For teenagers and parents facing stressful life changes due to the pandemic who are feeling anxious, isolated and disappointed, you are not alone. Included below are nine tips for how you can help your teenagers navigate the stresses of this pandemic. I am indebted for some of the tips to an article by Dr. Lisa Damour on the UNICEF website last year titled “How teenagers can protect their mental health during coronavirus (COVID-19)” Some of the tips also are from an earlier post I wrote on 3/27/19 titled “Eight tips to help teens manage stress”. For complete information on stress management, please read our book (I Can’t Take It Anymore: How to Manage Stress so It Doesn’t Manage You; Paul G. Longobardi, Ph.D., and Janice B. Longobardi, R.N., B.S.N., P.H.N.), available on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/dp/1542458056. For more information about the book, authors, and stress, please visit our website at www.manageyourhealthandstress.com. Here are the nine tips:
1. Recognize that your anxiety is completely normal. If school closures and alarming headlines are making you feel anxious, you are completely normal. “Psychologists have long recognized that anxiety is a normal and healthy function that alerts us to threats and helps us take measures to protect ourselves,” says Dr. Damour in her article. Too much anxiety can be debilitating. However, just enough anxiety helps us make focused decisions, such as to not spend time with other people or in large groups, washing your hands and not touching your face. Seek out reliable sources of information. If you become concerned that you are experiencing symptoms, it is important to speak to your parents about it. Most illness due to coronavirus is generally mild, particularly for children and young adults. Tell your parents or a trusted adult if you’re not feeling well, or if you’re feeling worried about the virus, so they can help.
2. Create distractions and engage in pleasant activities. We know that when we are faced with difficult situations, there are things we can do and things about which we can do nothing. Do the things you can, such as homework through online platforms, watching a favorite movie, reading, taking up something new you’ve wanted to try but have yet to do. It’s important for teens to find activities they find enjoyable. The activity can be almost anything teenagers find enjoyable, to include listening to music, reading for fun, working on projects with their hands.
3. Find new ways to connect with your friends Being a teenager is all about connecting to and spending time with friends. The current pandemic presents challenges but they are surmountable. If you want to spend time with friends while you’re practicing social distancing, social media is a great way to connect.
4. Learn how to do something new . You can start reading a new book or practicing a musical instrument. Now is a good time to do that. Focusing on yourself and finding ways to use your new-found time is a productive way to look after your mental health.
5. Feel your feelings Missing out on events with friends, hobbies, or sports matches is disappointing. Dr. Damour noted that “The best way to deal with this disappointment? Let yourself feel it. When it comes to having a painful feeling, the only way out is through. Go ahead and be sad, and if you can let yourself be sad, you’ll start to feel better faster.” Processing feelings is different for everyone. Dr. Damour observed that “Some kids are going to make art, some kids are going to want to talk to their friends and use their shared sadness as a way to feel connected in a time when they can’t be together in person, and some kids are going to want to find ways to get food to food banks,”. The key is to do what feels right to you.
6. Focus on and connect to family. Teenagers are concerned about and worry about family. Through social distancing they may have fewer opportunities to interact face to face with some family members to include grandparents. This again is a time to use all digital means to include face time, video conferencing, etc. to remain connected to and with grandparents and other family members outside of the immediate home.
7. Physical exercise. One of the more effective stress relief activities is to engage in exercise. It remains important, even in a pandemic, to engage in some exercise. Teens should find activities they enjoy, e.g. running, walking, yoga, skateboarding, etc. Many of these activities can be done outdoors as long as appropriate social distancing is maintained.
8. Sleep. To stay strong and increase resistance to potential viral infections, teens should continue to get their proper sleep, usually defined as approximately 9 hours per night. Surveys by the American Psychological Association show that teens report that they sleep on average only 7.4 hours per school night. Now that schools are out in most places for the current time, there is more opportunity for teenagers to sleep their proper hours. However, usual sleep hygiene recommendations apply. For example, reduce stimulating activities, e.g. TV and computers in the hour before sleep, and don’t drink stimulating beverages too close to bedtime.
9. Breathing/meditation/relaxation/mindfulness. Increasingly, various relaxation and present focusing strategies are being used to reduce stress and anxiety. These can be used to help teens learn how to focus and calm themselves in the face of challenges. This includes yoga, meditation, mindfulness, breathing exercises, many of which are accessible on the internet.
In this time of stress and anxiety over the coronavirus pandemic, there is much that can be done to assist youth in coping with these challenges as well as maintaining good mental health and well being. Let’s help and encourage them in these areas.
Good luck on your journey.
Dr. Paul Longobardi
For information on these and related topics, please see my website at www.successandmindset.com